Newsflash: I'm not a balloon
I was doing some much needed reading this morning on a website about coping with stress, depression, and other such issues and came across a very interesting thought and wanted to write about it to give myself some time to allow it to really sink in.
The past year has been a really tough one. Full of joys as well as hardships. I'm not interested in listing them as it only causes others to compare their "lot" to mine which then leads to one of us saying "I've got it worse". Let's just say it's been one of the toughest years of my life. And when the struggles come I find myself fighting that daily battle of "bouncing back". I blogged about this awhile back when talking about going down the spiral staircase and having a hard time (if not lack of desire) to work my way back up.
Well, it's that bouncing back idea that really seems to grip me at times. I go through whatever it is I'm struggling with and constantly think "why can't I just get over this?" -or- "why can't I just tell myself to be happy and it is so?" -or- "why can't I just pray or fast or whatever and it's all just better again?" Are you following me?
Well, this site gave me some needed insight into the answer to all of those questions. While I've been thinking of myself as a balloon...something without much substance, able to be stretched, poked, and prodded and then able to bounce back into shape/form with ease. Instead I am like clay (read Jeremiah 18 if you're not familiar with it).
I'm not a sculptor but I have had several chances to work with clay over the years, especially as a child. I remember the way it felt in my hand as I tried to make things of it (generally soccer balls and snakes). It was pretty tough to mold. When I pressed into it the clay would give into the pressure but would not spring back. If I smashed my clay soccer ball I would have to start the process of re-forming it...clapping it in my hands over and over, rolling it out, forming the smooth curves, doing everything needed to make it wanted I wanted it to be.
I know that God is continually in the process of making me who He wants me to be. There are a lot of stresses in life...things that press in on me (us) which seem to break my form. I am seemingly come to understand that when that happens I, by my very non-balloonish nature, am unable to immediately spring back, especially when the impression which has been made on me is deep. Rather, I must trust that my Sculptor is actively working to remove those impressions, those imperfections and that it is going to take some time before that process is completed.
The past year has been a really tough one. Full of joys as well as hardships. I'm not interested in listing them as it only causes others to compare their "lot" to mine which then leads to one of us saying "I've got it worse". Let's just say it's been one of the toughest years of my life. And when the struggles come I find myself fighting that daily battle of "bouncing back". I blogged about this awhile back when talking about going down the spiral staircase and having a hard time (if not lack of desire) to work my way back up.
Well, it's that bouncing back idea that really seems to grip me at times. I go through whatever it is I'm struggling with and constantly think "why can't I just get over this?" -or- "why can't I just tell myself to be happy and it is so?" -or- "why can't I just pray or fast or whatever and it's all just better again?" Are you following me?
Well, this site gave me some needed insight into the answer to all of those questions. While I've been thinking of myself as a balloon...something without much substance, able to be stretched, poked, and prodded and then able to bounce back into shape/form with ease. Instead I am like clay (read Jeremiah 18 if you're not familiar with it).
I'm not a sculptor but I have had several chances to work with clay over the years, especially as a child. I remember the way it felt in my hand as I tried to make things of it (generally soccer balls and snakes). It was pretty tough to mold. When I pressed into it the clay would give into the pressure but would not spring back. If I smashed my clay soccer ball I would have to start the process of re-forming it...clapping it in my hands over and over, rolling it out, forming the smooth curves, doing everything needed to make it wanted I wanted it to be.
I know that God is continually in the process of making me who He wants me to be. There are a lot of stresses in life...things that press in on me (us) which seem to break my form. I am seemingly come to understand that when that happens I, by my very non-balloonish nature, am unable to immediately spring back, especially when the impression which has been made on me is deep. Rather, I must trust that my Sculptor is actively working to remove those impressions, those imperfections and that it is going to take some time before that process is completed.
posted by Michael Shattuck at
2:00 AM
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